Yesterday, we established that marketing is a key component of real estate investing success. It’s an undeniable fact. So let’s move on to Fatal Flaw #2…
Fatal Flaw #2: Obsessions with “Avoiding Failure” rather than “Being Successful”
(NOTE: This Fatal Flaw is focused on the “mental” aspects of success. And in just a second, I’ll show you precisely how this is intimately related to real estate investing…)
Here’s an extreme statement: You will get whatever you want out of life.
You might disagree with that – but it’s true. It’s called the “Law of Attraction”. It states that you will always attract to yourself the things you focus on internally with most intensity and consistency…
…I don’t know why it’s true. But it is. And virtually all newbies are more focused on “Avoiding Failure” rather than “Being Successful”.
This might not seem so bad. After all, it’s a good thing to avoid failure. But the problem is that the human brain doesn’t do a good job of processing negative statements. For example:
Do not think about a 3-headed donkey.
What did you do? In order for you “not to think about” a 3-headed donkey, you first have to create a picture in your mind of a 3-headed donkey. Now your memory contains a picture of a non-existent animal…
…The 3-headed donkey example is a simple example that does no harm to your mind, because you’ll likely forget it as quickly as you created the picture to begin with. But the notion of “avoiding failure” is far more significant. As a test, consider this command:
Right Now, Think about avoiding failure.
The same principle holds true here. Before you can consider the notion of “avoiding” failure, you’ve first got to focus on what the term “failure” means. And it’s not pretty. It could mean losing some money. It could mean losing your home. It could mean going bankrupt. It could mean all sorts of things…
…but one thing is true: Everything about your mental concept of failure is negative. And when one focuses so heavily on “avoiding failure”, those negative mental images will definitely permeate your mind and will almost certainly leave you in a semi-paralyzed state, unable to take action.
And when you don’t take action, you don’t succeed. Period.
So here’s my next (and final) challenge to you for this post:
Right Now, Think About Massive Success As A Real Estate Investor
What will it mean for you to be massively successful? Will it mean that you own a portfolio of 50 houses that throw off $10,000 to $20,000 per month in cash flow? Will it mean freedom from your job and employer? Will it mean being able to pay for your children’s college education?
Whatever it means to you, the attraction of success is certainly more motivating to your mind than is the avoidance of failure. When you focus on success, your mind will be able to attract it.
…But when you focus on avoiding failure, then your definition of “success” will be nothing more than the avoidance of disaster. And nobody ever became truly wealthy by focusing on the avoidance of disaster.
HOWEVER…
This does not mean you shouldn’t use good business sense in advance to protect yourself from problems. For example:
- You should absolutely run your real estate business through a legal entity (corporation, partnership, LLC, etc) of some sort to shield you from any personal legal liability
- You should use the very best legal forms & documents available whenever agreeing to buy or sell property
- And you should certainly seek out excellent advice from people who are already successful as investors, rather than learning everything “the hard way”
Good news – you’ll learn about all of these things here on RealEstate.BryanEllis.com in other articles. In the mean time, begin to train your brain to focus on the achievement of success rather than the avoidance of failure. You’ll be glad you did.
Excellent Points. I do find myself in the avoiding failure category, which has ultimately led to me not doing anything. I have found a mantra that is helping a bit:
“I am creative and can solve any problem”
Not sure where I heard it, but using it everyday all day keeps me motivated and focused on doing my best. Instead of dwelling on the worst and doing nothing at all.
This article reminded me of the DVD and book entitled The Secret.
This ‘fear of failure’ I think is the hardest thing for REIs to overcome. It has been for me but I’m trying to push myself to get through that 1st deal and then I think all of that fear will be behind me. I do however have my RE business already structured under an LLC and I have been marketing, building a buyer’s list and I’ve also added a related Credit Restoration business to help me get qualified buyers and as an added service for sellers.
Hi yes is this all so good for real estate wholesaleing? thank you.
By all means, this definitely applies to wholesaling! — Bryan Ellis
Don’t let the “what if’s” be negative, make the “what if’s” be positive!
Positive thoughts bring positive results!!!
Fearing Failure is Fatal to any venture. Failure is complete only when you stop trying and refuse to learn from it. Your article is on the mark.
Thank you so much for sharing free information! I am a newbie to real estate investing and find your articles very, very helpful!!!!
I will be a successful investor and tell myself that everyday. No three headed donkey’s here! HA!!!
Just wanted to express my appreciation for your time and help!
Linda
Very good advice and I think the best part, besides the avoiding failure part, is the insistance on using a legal entity to purchase or hold real estate. People can just look at hotels to see how important this is and how every hotel is held and why.
The concept here is kind of like saving money for a rainy day. Not the best idea unless you have it well defined what you are saving the money for.
I think the biggest problem is using legal documents that everyone can agree on. All too often the documents one party insists on using are not very good for the other party and I have found this can cause all nature of conflict, mostly with realtors, most of which have no idea what should or should not be in a document.
Is this something that is going to be covered in an upcoming article or class?
I’ve been working full-time from home for the past 14 years. I got to where I am by failing just as much as I have succeeded. And believe me, I’ve made mistakes all along the way. And I’ve learned from them.
So… What IS “failing” exactly, anyway?
To me, failing is dying. Or quitting. Anything other than that, and I’m still in the game. As long as I can live to fly another mission, I’ve “won”.
Thanks for writing this – it needed to be said!
Thanks, Bryan, for all your good points…
Proverbs 4:23 says that out of the heart proceeds the issues of life. So what is really taking place, rather than life proceeding in some happenstance way, life is actually being formed out of the beliefs in our hearts. We are literally reaching out into the future and preparing the road that we are going to walk on by what is in our hearts. Who you think you are in your heart is who you are going to be.
Keep up the good work!
Mark
I am now including you as someone I will always read when going through my numerious rei emails. You seem very fair, and not a “just buy my stuff” guru. You seem to truly want to send your following the honest truth. I read this particular article right when I was feeling most down this morning about how slow my advancement has been in my real estate business, which is short sales, wholesaling, and negotiating modifications. I live in the heart of the African American community here on the southside of Chicago, (no, the whole southside is not a war zone). I market to most of the far south side and south suburban areas. There are sooo many people that need help, sooo many great deals; and here I am knowing what to do, but not having the resources to get my marketing out, there where it needs to be to both other investors and end-buyers.
When I am perplexed and confused-I start listening to my fear, and I know that’s not good. In my community there are many, many real estate opportunities, but just as many problems with attracting buyers from those opportunities. Having come across this article, and then having read several more of your other articles; will now keep me following your emails more intensely. Thank you for that little bit of “shot in the arm” reading.